'Twas the Night Before Christmas (In MCO)

[RuntyRebel]

'Twas the night before Christmas
When all through the city
Not a sole was out racing
Not even Dotty
The garage floors had been emptied, revealing thin air
In hopes that the UPS man would soon be there

The gearheads were working, all snug in their shops
The scammers were scamming, all busting their chops
The ex somewhere in Skoggit, I in Gas Town
Had slammed the hood on the '70, and went to lie down

When out on the streets there arose such a clatter
I hopped into the Mustang to see what was the matter
I shifted into third with smoke engulfing the tires
There's something out there, but what it was, I had to inquire

The moon lit the streets, but not a sole was to be seen
Had I been hallucinating? Was it a dream?
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
A candy apple Chevy with a fresh coat of clear

With a fierce looking driver, so fast and so taunt
I knew in a moment, it was no other than Daunt
More rapid than Clydesdales, his horsepower mocked
He revved and burnt out; should I have flocked?

Carburetor! Camshaft! Pistons and Rods!
Crankshaft! Cylinder heads! All were top-notch!
My, how it gleamed! My how it glistened!
That 302 spoke loud for those who had listened!

Like a young child near Michael Jackson; man how he fled!
Like telling a joke to Jessica Simpson; right over my head!
I drove back to my shop, and pulled the car in
Hopped out through the window, and raced like the wind

And then in a twinkling, I heard at the door
The sound of a smallblock, and its connoisseur
As I was sprinting, and had entered the shop
Daunt burst open the door which came down with a flop!

He was dressed in jeans, and a t-shirt of white
His teeth had sparkled like the stars of the night
A bundle of parts he flung over his back
And he looked like Sparkey T, just opening his pack

His eyes-how they shone! His dimples-how scary!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His Leno-chinned mouth drew up like a bow
And the make-up he wore, was as white as a ho's

The stump of a cigar, he held tight in his mouth
He puffed it so oddly; he must be from the south
He had an odd face, and a round little belly
And it shook when he laughed like Liza Minnelli

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old guy
And I laughed when I saw him; I think we know why
A flip of the bird, and a twist of the head
Soon gave me to know, I was all but half dead

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work
And filled all the garage floors, then turned with a jerk
And flipping the bird, aside of his face
And out the door, he had soon left this place

He sprang to the Chevy, to himself gave a whistle
And away he drove off, like a Taliban-intended missle
But I heard him exclaim as he drove for the sticks
"Merry Christmas to Motor City, and EA, you're *****!"

[MsLilly]

BRavo Runty youve outdone yourself this time!